Sino Ako?

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Davao City, Philippines
"Hi, Me!" coz my name is Hayme and I still am getting to know myself. A Medical student. A geek. A hopeless romantic. Gay. Single since being out. Single since birth for that matter. Accompany me as I redefine myself.

Sunday, October 17, 2010


Alas. My mind isn't infinite at all. I try to learn as much as I could but then time erodes what knowledge I keep cramped in my neurons. I could only imagine being Spock, able to recall and apply all Vulcan mathematical equations and formulas that could explain the laws governing the universe. I too would want to be the Spock of Medicine. But, alas, I am not a Vulcan. Haysh.

What brought about this geeky entry? Well, my sister made me watch Big Bang Theory the other night and it sure is comedy for the likes of me. If you are well read in the Sciences, especially Physics and Chemistry, and you know a little of Politics, Economics and Geography, well then, you could expect a good laugh from the said show. Then, last night, a friend FB-ed me a video depicting Albert Einstein's view that God exists. Well, I've always adored the genius of Einstein. If I could be him, that would be the closest I'd get to becoming a Vulcan. Waha. Next thing I knew, I was reading through Wikipedia's entry on him. Hohum, I was again dragged to the reality that I do not possess a brain of his level. I could not understand half of what the article on Relativity, Equivalence Principle, Adiabatic Invariance etc. were saying. Haysh. Too good to be true.

It frustrates me.


Wednesday, October 13, 2010


So yeah, I'm back after being out for so long. It's not that I wasn't online. I was. I just didn't have something worth my and your while to write about. That and because its our finals month this October. Then again, that doesn't necessarily mean this post is actually of substance.


So I have accepted my fate. I will not pass Pathology and Surgery this Semester. This, I now reckon, is the reason why Medical School and colleges, universities and academic institutions all across the planet employ at least a bi-semestral year. To the best of my projections, a 70 in both subjects wouldn't be short of a miracle. Better buy me more of that midnight oil come second semester.


I'm tired. Has anyone ever experienced blanking out for more than an hour? I have. Everyday, almost.

I hail a jeep and the moment I embark, I sit, stare into space, then after a flick from an invisible finger, I'm there where I'm supposed to get off. Like, an hour has gone without me noticing. I swear. I don't know how it happens nor can I explain it. I always think I have gone to sleep but then it just doesn't feel like how its supposed to feel after you've woken up. I don't feel groggy at all, nor disoriented even just for a bit. This one time, I was jolted to reality by the feeling of holding something in my hand which wasn't there before just to find out that I was clutching my 40 peso change in the form of one 20 peso bill, one 10 peso coin, and ten 1 peso coins. I don't even remember paying. HONEST.

This one time, my classmate grabbed my pen from my polo pocket so I had to hold on to his hand saying "Oh, ba't nangingialam ka ng gamit ng may gamit?" just to be told "Huh? Kakapagpaalam ko lang ah!". HONEST. Really.

I get soooooo tired my brain manages to shut every unimportant impulse just so it can have some R& the detriment of making me resemble an iPod in some standby mode.


I managed to down two tablespoons worth of coffee over a span of 1 and a half hours. See, when I'm tired, and I mean REALLY tired, almost nothing can make me want to stay awake. One of the few things though apt for the job of keeping me alert is coffee. Last night, however, I've noticed how my body wasn't reacting to my usual concoction of 1 teaspoon of Nescafe coffee. My Cytochrome P450's must have done a pretty good job of desensitizing my body. What I did was to toughen my usual drink and see what happens. It kept me up from 1AM to 8AM.


I just suddenly had this longing to see this McDonald's commercial one afternoon. This ad was the one where the lead was a closeted gay guy and he was with his dad at McDonald's. So yeah...just watch it...

I SO LOVE how he flicked his dreamy eyes 32 seconds into the clip. That move makes me remember Mona Lisa and her I-Know-Something-You-Don't-Know sort of look.